I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
