So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
