guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
