i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
