Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
