ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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