instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
