Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
