At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
