Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
