wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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