Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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