I need help removing her.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
