New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
