at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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