I hate your face
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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