we made out on top of his cat.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize