i would punch a child for taco bell
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
