That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize