ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
