i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
