I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
