Don't you send me to vm
did you get engaged???
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize