All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
