i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
