I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Little spoons don't ask big questions
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
