My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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