A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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