have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
