Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
