I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
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By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
