My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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