What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
The cops high fived after they tackled you
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
