is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Randomize
