he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You pole danced in your parka.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
