lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
he quoted the bible to break up with me
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
