do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
