What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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