Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
