Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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