Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
