No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize