brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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