The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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