Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize