its not stalking. its research.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
