He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
