ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
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It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
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I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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