You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize