don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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