Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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